Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Katie's Journey Chapter 3 Coming Soon!!!!

Ok.. so I haven't posted in ages! ( not really )  ;)  I have some news! I finally got started on the 3rd chapter of Katie's Journey! I will get it up as soon as I can.
Just thought I'd tell ya'll that. :D
 
~Mallory Beth

5 comments:

Rebekah said...

I know it sometimes takes a while to get on with the next part of a story. :)

Do you mind if I give you a few hints on writing?
I haven't gotten to read all that you've written yet, but I did notice that you need a little help with punctuation when people talk. :) You only need one punctuation. Here are some examples of what it should look like:

"Spot is tired," Sue said.
"Spot is tired?" Joe asked.
"Spot is tired!" exclaimed Sally.
Tom agreed, "Spot is tired."

(I hope they let Spot rest. ;) )

Let me know if you want any other hints. :) I know there is at least one more thing that I've been working with my students on, but if you'd rather just write things they way you are, that's fine. Just thought I'd offer. :)

Rebekah said...

Okay, since you asked, here's the other thing I had noticed.

Have you ever watched a movie where the characters are moving around, talking and such but the background is all a greyish/white? Where the characters drive things that sound like they have engines but you can't see anything or characters who sit on invisible chairs? (If you have, tell me what movie it is! :) )
That is one thing I've noticed is missing from your story. A setting. Not only that but I can't feel the sea breeze whipping my dress or blowing my hair back from my face. I can't smell the saltiness of the sea, hear the crowds of people talking, or see the harbor.
I also can't see or feel their home. Is it cold, warm? Are there any birds that sing in the mornings, any animals that make noise or all they all silent? Your story is missing the settings that make your readers feel as though they can picture everything. I'd suggest practicing writing descriptions, or as I tell my students, "painting the setting with words."

If you want to practice, a good way to do it is to get a calendar and try writing a description of what you see. And don't stop with what you see, add what you "hear" and what you "feel." It can be challenging at first if you've never written descriptions, but once you start doing it, it'll become easier.

Let me know if you have any questions. You can email me at readanotherpage [at] gmail [dot] com if you want.

Have fun!

Rebekah said...

Feel free to answer my comments on this blog. I'll be back by to check and see if you've replied. :)

Grace Upon Grace said...

Ok. :) I hated to comment back on your blog, but usually people ask me to answer them on their blogs. And I never know if they check back... so it's kind of a habit. :)

Rebekah said...

It's not a problem. :)